When someone dies, do you really need to keep things to remember them by?

Rings

All objects become imprinted with the energy of what happens around them. If someone gives you a personal item, or you buy something second-hand, it will carry the energy traces of the person who owned it before. If it was used a lot, used for a long time, or had very strong emotional connections for that person, the imprints will be correspondingly stronger.

This is the whole basis of psychometry, that a trained person can hold, say, a ring belonging to another person, and can translate the vibrational frequency of that ring and describe the person who owned it without having met them. It is also why people treasure the personal belongings of those who were close to them and have died. They may not put it in these words, but they want to own something that has the energy imprint of that person.

Keeping personal items after a bereavement

For a while, it can be very comforting to a grieving heart to have some things like this. However, your fond memories do not depend on this, the energy imprinting will fade over time. If you keep an item for many years as a way of trying to hold on to someone who has gone and have no use for it other than this, then stagnant energies will collect around it in the same way as they do around other objects that are not used. In other words, it will become a kind of clutter. If there is unresolved grief, then layers of sadness will accumulate around it too.

When you think about it, it’s quite curious that when someone dies, their everyday personal belongings can somehow become so special. When they were alive, their things were just things, but after they die, they can take on a unique significance.

Of course, it’s not really to do with the objects themselves. It’s to do with the associations you have with them. Resolve the grief and you will see each item for what it is – something that just happened to belong to someone you loved. It then becomes possible to easily let it go.

And how to resolve the grief? I looked for many years for a method I could recommend to people to help with this, and am happy to say I have found one. You can find more information here:

The Grief Recovery Method
After a bereavement

Related post
Energy imprints in second-hand things

Copyright © Karen Kingston, 2017


Posted in Clutter clearing, Grief recovery | Read 2 comments...»

Teens, tweens and technology

Teeneger with phone

I was asked recently, what is the most worrying trend that I see in the bedrooms of teens and tweens these days? Without doubt, it is mobile devices such as smartphones and tablets that are kept turned on all night while recharging, usually placed next to the bed or even under the pillow so that messages can quickly and easily be checked.

The four main problems associated with this are:

  • Tiredness (caused by waking up to check the device)
  • Insomnia (caused by interrupted melatonin production)
  • WiFi exposure (because the device is polling for signals all night long)
  • Electromagnetic field exposure (because the device is plugged into mains electricity to recharge)

What a survey revealed

A 2016 survey of 2,750 pupils revealed some alarming facts. Commissioned by the Headmasters’ and Headmistresses’ Conference, which represents the top independent schools in the UK and Ireland, it found that 45% of 11-18 year-olds check their mobile device at least once after they go to bed, and 23% of these check more than ten times per night. Being woken ten times per night would be classed as a form of torture if it were inflicted rather than self-chosen!

68% of pupils admitted that the use of mobile devices at night impairs their ability to study the next day. What many are not aware of is that keeping a device so close to the body all night, every night, also exposes them to high levels of radiofrequency signals (WiFi) and electromagnetic fields (EMFs) which can impact their health and cause them to have busy thoughts that prevent deep levels of rest even if they never check for updates.

Solutions

Teens and tweens want to stay connected to their friends. Connected is cool. But being online 24/7 is not sustainable. Something has to give, and it’s usually health or vitality. FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and the dopamine highs that make social media so addictive are factors in why it’s difficult to break the habit. But doing so is very empowering. It teaches young people to make their own choices instead of succumbing to peer pressure, and fosters greater self-confidence.

Some schools are now offering sleep lessons to educate pupils about the importance of rest, and Digital Awareness UK has also come up with a list of recommendations that include:

  • No screentime within 90 minutes of bedtime
  • Turn the device to airplane mode or off during the hours of sleep
  • Recharge the device far away from the bed or, better still, in another room
  • Use an app to reduce the blue light emitted by devices after nightfall so that melatonin production is not affected

An idea that is catching on is for parents to make a clear contract with their teen or tween, such as this one: To my 13-year-old, an iPhone contract from your mom, with love

And you’ll need to lead by example, of course. You can’t expect them to make lifestyle changes unless you do so first!

Related articles
Teenage use of mobile devices during the night
Why online searching can be addictive
Are you a single, double, or triple screener?
Is your cellphone zapping you while you sleep?

Copyright © Karen Kingston 2017


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How many yaks have you shaved lately without even knowing it?

Cartoon yak

You know what it’s like. You start the day with good intentions but get side-tracked and don’t end up doing any of the things you planned to do.

Sometimes this happens because you are too easily distractible, in which case you need to learn to make a To Do List, prioritize everything on it in order of decreasing importance, and make sure you at least get the essential tasks done. This will give you a satisfying sense of achievement at the end of the day.

Sometimes it happens because there are unexpected calls on your attention. This is bound to occur occasionally, but if it happens too often you may need to learn to say no from time to time so that you can prioritize your own needs. There are genuine exceptions, of course, but people who always put others first are usually avoiding something in their own life that they don’t want to deal with.

What this article is about is another type of side-tracking that most people don’t recognize because they don’t have a name for it. And yet I’m sure after I explain it, you’ll realize it happens to you a lot.

It’s called yak shaving, and is defined as any series of unrelated tasks that have to be completed before you can do the job you first set out to do.

How yak shaving happens

The key word in this definition is “unrelated”. Everyone understands that when they set out to do a task, there may be a series of related things that need to be done. For example, if you want to renew your passport, you need to have your photo taken, fill in the forms, and post the documents to the relevant office or perhaps make a trip to the office in person. Step 1 is followed by Step 2, which is then followed by Step 3. It’s a linear progression, with each step logically following on from the last.

Yak shaving is not like this at all. How this scenario might look when yak shaving is involved is that you need to get a new passport, but in order to do that you first need to get a new photo taken, but in order to do that you need to get a haircut, and in order to do that you first need to get your car repaired so that you can drive to town to get it done. And so instead of applying for your passport, you spend the entire day getting your car fixed and feeling frustrated because you never got started on the job you first set out to do. That’s yak shaving!

Made famous by author and blogger, Seth Godin, the example he gives on his blog is about the process of wanting to wax his car, but to do this he first has to buy a new hose, but to do that he first needs to borrow his neighbour’s E-Zpass to cross a toll bridge to get to Home Depot, and to do that he first needs to restuff the mooshi pillow his son borrowed from the neighbour. Hence ending up at the zoo shaving a yak!

Yak shaving strategies

Hopefully your own examples are not as obscure as this, but they certainly can be. The reason why it’s important to stop, catch yourself in the act, and realize you are yak shaving is because this immediately takes you out of feeling like a victim of circumstances and helps to reduce the feelings of frustration that can arise.

Better still, now that you are wise to it, you can spot that it is about to happen, have a little chuckle to yourself about it, and either decide to continue with good-natured enthusiasm or leave that particular yak unshaven for now and find another way to accomplish your goal (in my example, perhaps get a friend to give you a lift, or catch a bus or taxi instead).

A good sense of humour is definitely an asset when it comes to yak shaving, which is why I have chosen a cute cartoon yak for the picture that accompanies this blog. Next time this happens to you, bring this image to mind, smile, and make a conscious decision to shave it or not. Be aware too, that entire herds of yaks can emerge when there’s clutter clearing to be done, so be particularly alert for them at those times.

Related articles
Mastering the art of yak shaving

Copyright © Karen Kingston 2017
First published at SixtyandMe.com on March 9, 2017


Posted in Lifestyle & awareness | Read 4 comments...»

Facial clutter clearing

Before and after beard photos

Clutter takes many forms.

A man once wrote to me to say, ‘After reading your book on decluttering, I decided to shave off my beard of ten years. Would you consider this a form of decluttering the body?’

Absolutely! Some men grow beards for religious or other deliberately chosen personal reasons, but my general perception is that most use them to hide behind. It makes them feel less emotionally vulnerable.

I wrote to ask him if he agreed with this. Did he feel more exposed after shaving his beard off?

He replied, ‘I had to think for a while in order to answer your question. Concerning the “hiding” aspect, I would agree with you in my case. I had just shaved it off the day I first emailed you. I find your observation quite intriguing.

‘After considering my emotional vulnerability, I would say, yes, I am experiencing a little more of it. I grew the beard after a failed promotion at work and continued to work at that company for four years. It was not until my wife and I read your decluttering book that I considered even changing my face to the world.

‘Since our last communication, I have cleared out the attic, recommenced a heretofore unfinished home improvement project, and most importantly, have sorted through and discarded old working papers from my previous employer! How’s that for progress!’

Copyright © Karen Kingston 2017


Posted in Clutter clearing | Read 4 comments...»

Why sugar in your diet is like clutter in your home

Sugar cubes

There’s a wonderful story in the opening paragraphs of William Dufty’s bestselling book, Sugar Blues, where he describes his first encounter with Gloria Swanson, the biggest Hollywood star of the 1920s, who he met at a lunchtime press conference held in a building on New York’s Fifth Avenue.

I unwrapped my sandwich, sprung the lid off my coffee jug, picked up a sugar cube. I was unpeeling it when I heard her commanding whisper: ‘That stuff is poison,’ she hissed. ‘I won’t have it in my house, let alone my body…’

I dropped the sugar cube. I notice the space in front of Miss Swanson was bare of clutter. She wasn’t having any of our picnic. She had brought her own – a piece of tree-ripened, unsprayed something. She offered me some. I had never tasted anything better in my life. I told her so.

‘It haunted me for days,’ he wrote. ‘Whenever I reached for those sugar tongs, I would draw back and think of her injunction.’

He’d been addicted to sugar since he was a child so dropping the habit wasn’t easy. But he did it. Within five months he had dropped all his excess weight, from 205 pounds (93 Kg) down to 135 pounds (61 Kg), and all his chronic health problems melted away too. In his own words, ‘I ended up with a new body, a new head, a new life.’ He also eventually ended up with a new wife, marrying the illustrious Gloria Swanson some years later.

Giving up sugar

I first read William Dufty’s book in 1987 and immediately gave up sugar myself. Reading the book has that effect. It wakes you up to how we’ve all been duped into thinking that sugar is a harmless treat, when in fact it’s a toxic substance that is a major factor in obesity, tooth decay, diabetes, heart disease and other illnesses, and which pours massive profits into the coffers of multinational corporations who don’t give a hoot about our health. Any time sugar starts straying back into my diet, I read the book again, and I’m back to zero sugar in a matter of days.

At first, it takes a fair amount of willpower to give up sugar, but after the addiction has gone, which most people find takes only 2-4 weeks, living sugar-free settles into a balanced way of life. When I see something sweet on a supermarket shelf now, I sometimes fondly remember the taste. But then I remember the agenda of the giant sugar industry behind it and the after-effects I would feel in my body if I ate it, and I happily walk away.

The truth about sugar

What most people don’t realize about sugar is that it has a very dark history. Its cultivation lay at the heart of the development of the slave trade, and the lucrative income from sugar taxes was the main reason governments turned a blind eye to the issue for so long. Nowadays, the blind eye is being turned to the issue of everyone’s health.

The fact is that sugar has no nutritional content. In fact, it actively leaches vitamins and minerals from the body. In an emergency situation, you will live longer if you eat nothing rather than eating sugar.

A woman who came to one of my workshops gave a memorable testimony to this. She told how she had been in a Nazi concentration camp and wisely didn’t eat the sugar cubes or candy bars that were handed out by well-meaning American rescuers. She survived. Those who ate them died in agony very quickly.

Another story I often heard when I lived in Bali concerned some nursing mothers, whose milk had dried up because they had no food to eat during a period of hardship. They hit upon the idea of feeding their babies sugar water and sadly, all their babies died. The babies who were fed plain water were emaciated, but most of them lived.

Hidden sugar

Sugar is now in so many foods, disguised in the form of corn syrup, rice syrup, molasses, barley malt, maltodextrin, and just about everything ending in -ose (fructose, glucose, sucrose, sucralose, dextrose, lactose, maltose, and so on). Even so-called healthy forms of sugar such as honey, maple syrup, agave, brown sugar, coconut sugar and fruit juice concentrate affect the body in the same way. Honey, for example, has a lower glycemic index than refined sugar, so does not cause blood sugar levels to spike as quickly, but it has a lot more calories and affects our organs just as much as other sugars do.

If you check the labels on packets, you’ll find sugar is in foods you might not have suspected, such as bread, soups, sauces, salad dressings, health bars, yoghurts, baked beans and most breakfast cereals. Sushi, on average, contains a tablespoon of sugar for each cup of rice, and sugar is commonly injected into processed meats. The list goes on and on.  Even natural fruit is so much sweeter now than it used to be that we need to limit its consumption. Many nutritionists recommend only one or two pieces of fruit a week. And, of course, high levels of sugar are in all fruit juices, soft drinks, energy drinks, and alcohol.

To learn more about hidden sugar, there’s a very informative film featuring Hugh Jackman and Stephen Fry called That Sugar Film. Written, directed by, and starring Damon Gameau, it documents what happens when he starts eating so-called healthy foods that are laden with sugar after being sugar-free for three years. Here’s a preview of what it reveals:

I ate 40 tablespoons of sugar a day. This is what happened.

In the UK, multiple tooth extractions resulting from extreme tooth decay are now the main reason why children are admitted to hospital, and according to Professor Dame Sally Davies, the Chief Medical Officer for England, the cost of treating obesity has risen to more than the national spending on the police, fire and judiciary combined. The situation is completely out of control. Jamie Oliver’s successful campaign for a UK tax on sugar drinks was a step in the right direction but a drop in the ocean of educational change that’s needed.

Why we like sugar

To appreciate why so many people are hooked on sugar, it’s necessary to understand that it is not just chemically addictive. It also affects us at a subtle body level. The sugar rush we are all familiar with is not as intense as the high that comes from taking drugs such as heroin or cocaine, but it has some similarities. We crave sugar because it creates a thrill that can be felt in the blood stream and brain within minutes, and mimics some of the natural feelings of well-being that accompany high spiritual states of consciousness. However, as with drugs, it’s a false high that is always followed by a crash, making us want to consume more to experience the thrill again.

You may be interested to know that this roller-coaster effect is one of the main reasons why it’s a prerequisite for the professional space clearing practitioners I train that they eliminate sugar from their diet. If their blood sugar is constantly surging up and down, it will seriously skew their perception, and they will not be able to accurately feel, interpret and work with energies in buildings. And if they rely on false highs to get them through the day, they will not be able to access the high-level spiritual platform from which an authentic space clearing ceremony is conducted. Excessive sweetness in the blood also puts them more at risk for picking up entities in the buildings they clear because it’s very common for entities to be attracted to sugar.

How to quit sugar

As the title of this article suggests, sugar is a form of clutter in the body, and the key to quitting it is the same as for clearing clutter. It begins with a fundamental change of standpoint.

In the same way that many people become motivated to clear out the junk in their home when they realize it’s a liability rather than an asset, so it becomes very much easier to reduce your sugar intake or eliminate it completely when you see how you’ve been conned into wanting it. You may have grown up with it, but that doesn’t mean you have to keep consuming it. You may like it, but your taste buds can be re-educated. You may think you need it, but when you get past the craving, you won’t feel that way anymore.

The bottom line is, if your life isn’t sweet enough, eating sugar won’t fix that. In fact, it will eventually add to your woes in the form of brain fog, lethargy or health issues in one form or another.

In our impatient, fast-paced, quick-fix, instant gratification world, it’s easy to see why so many people seek the easily available satisfaction of sugar. But in the same way that sugar offers only empty calories, so the main psychological ailment of modern times is an empty and meaningless life. There are other factors involved, of course, but there’s a clear connection between the two.

Related articles
Swedish mum’s battle against sugar goes viral

Copyright © Karen Kingston 2017


Posted in Lifestyle & awareness | Read 7 comments...»

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